Monday, August 31, 2009

Struggle

My kidney stones are still present, but I have an appointment with the doctor this week. I have continually fought the mental battle of running the past year or so and the kidney stone issue isn't helping one bit. I've taken time off (even before the stones), but that didn't help. I know what I need to do, get up and move, but when you're hurting it just doesn't happen. I've gained wait, feel unfit, and when I do run I'm not seeing those miraculous goals happening like they were when I was new to running. The concept of running was hard at the beginning, but the pounds melting off was a huge payoff (that's not happening now). Then I started to eat healthy and I felt like a machine. Of course I wasn't close to being a machine, but I felt the best I've ever have in my life. At the same time I was so obsessed with running and what was being put in my mouth that I felt like I was also becoming a robot. I started to back off a bit so I could become more human....unfortunately that backing off lead to slacking, which has lead me to where I am now. I feel like a broken record, because I know I've blogged about this multiple times, but I'm hoping at some point a lightbulb will go on and I'll find my motivation to get my ass moving regularly and find that happy medium. In the meantime our work schedules are back to the "school schedule," so hopefully that will help. I'm also thinking about signing up for this run. (virtually of course). It's an excellent cause and you can't help but love the mascot, eh? And as always, if you have a run you're working towards, even if not competitively, that helps you get out and moving

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