Tuesday, December 18, 2007


There's ice still on the ground meaning no running for today, again. David was so gracious to surprise me yesterday with a pair of YakTrax in hopes to help me out. They are things to put on your shoes that help you grip ice/snow. However, all that was available was the walker version meaning they probably aren't strong enough to withstand constant pounding from running. Ah well. He tried and I'm truly thankful. As of now I have an email into Erika and hope to get a reply soon to know what she recommends. She told me a few weeks back about a specific brand, but the name has left my mind. By the time I get them the snow will have melted and I won't need them. But at least I'll be prepared for the next snowfall.

Christmas is coming. What does that mean? Holiday parties. When I think of Holiday Parties, I think stress. Thankfully we only have one gathering. The thing is, it's the stressful to go to one. Actually, I enjoy them thoroughly. It's the preparation that's stressful for me. No, not the cooking, cleaning, etc. It's the trying to find something to wear. I know 9 out of 10 people could care less what I'm wearing, but it's still something I dread thinking about. The bottom line is I don't dress up. I have no reason to dress up. I wear scrubs when I work, which is 5-6 days per week, and I work 12 hour days. What does that mean? I live in my scrubs. When I get home I don't change out of my scrubs and get all dolled up. If anything, I hop in the shower and get cozy in PJ's and head to bed. And on my off days it's jeans and a t-shirt or sweater. Gone are the days that I dressed up for school at least 2 days a week. I couldn't imagine a career change at this time. Not only would I hate dressing up everyday but I would have nothing to wear. And when I say nothing, I mean nothing. You open my closet and 3/4 of my clothes are scrubs. No joke.

The only time I dress up is usually for family gatherings. And that usually requires a purchase of a new outfit. Having already worn an outfit for the last gathering, Heaven forbid I would wear it to the next. Then add on top of that, with my ever changing weight none of the clothes ever fit. I always have every size on God's green Earth in my closet, BUT the size I need. And you know I can't just walk into a store, pick out an outfit and have it be perfect. Oh, do I wish that were the case. I think dress pants are even harder to find than jeans. They will fit perfectly around the waist but will drag on the ground (and that's with 3 inch heels!). And it's not something that you can easily rig with safety pins or something. We're talking about 3 inches on the ground. But if I go with the petite sizing, they're high waters. Then you have all of these gorgeous dresses for the winter season. All with no sleeves. Right. Like I'm going to got out in a dress with no sleeves. What are they thinking?

So basically what it comes down to is for anything that I must dress up for, I have to go out and purchase an outfit that by next season/year I cannot wear due to already having worn it or size. I hold on to it for a few years, which crowds my closet, and then finally get rid of it. What a waste. And as stated in a previous post, I've recently become more aware of my wastefulness. I am truly thankful for all I have, but I look at it all, especially clothes-wise, and it hurts my heart. By being more aware of my wastefulness shopping is definitely not as fun anymore but at least I'm aware of it. Instead of buying it just because it's cute I go through the "do I need it?" questions and 99% of the time it's answered with a "no." I think I'll just stick with my scrubs and jeans for the time being. Try to simplify. Only give me the bare necessities, in all aspects of my life. I'm not there yet, nor will I ever be. But I can try.

As for this weekend's family gathering. I have no idea what I'm going to wear. I think it may just be jeans. This I do know, my closet has gone through it's purge for this month and it's nice having space. I think I'll keep it that way.

1 comment:

Cheryl Aloha said...

Wear a pear of nice jeans and a nice holiday sweater! I am sure whatever you wear you'll be beautiful.

Hope you can get a run soon! You sound a bit like you're getting cabin feaver. Hang in there!